Author Archives: Kiah Nordgren

Have I avoided writing for the past week because blocking off pain is the only way I know how to deal with actual hurt? Yes.  Am I already crying, after spending the last week fighting so very hard against any ounce of feeling, positive or negative (and failing for the most part?) Yes.  I don’tContinue reading “Afterward.”

Reading through my massive book stack is a task that will not be completed in time, especially since I’ve renewed my library card. I’m such a nerd, yeah I know, blah blah blah. All the books I’ve been reading have been romances. (Not on purpose at all. I generally make it my rule to hateContinue reading “Self Sabotage”

I think I’ve been at home for far too long. Say what you want, I do not thrive being in one place for too long. One place that I am not suited for, that is. The parallels to early April are striking. My closest friends from around here have gone to college, quitting jobs, leavingContinue reading “Waiting Game”

Its stupid to be sad.  It’s stupid to write about that sadness.  It’s stupid to post about that sadness.  Am I digging the same hole for myself all over again, after spending the past few months climbing back out of it? Of course I am.  My life is a series of cycles.  Nothing ever lasts.Continue reading “Stupid”

50 days.  Until the start of Advance.  Things will kick into motion a bit before that.  48 until I’m back in Washington.  46 until I see Trevor again.  30 ish until I leave Lumber House, very likely for good.  25 until I see my extended family members for the last time for a year orContinue reading “Leaving (again), and other misadventures”

Feeling depressed on an all expenses paid vacation to the mountains is disgusting, and I hate that about myself.  I think I hate a lot about myself. I’ve never truly loved myself. I’m usually at neutral, and on occasion, that all too familiar hatred creeps back in.  But alas, I’m not here to wallow inContinue reading “Out of Titles”

So much has happened today, and its not really bad, just a lot, and I think getting in the habit of writing to process not just when I’m being big sad could keep this from becoming a dangerous hobby again.  I’ll go in order of my day.  I woke up and grabbed my phone toContinue reading “Interesting Relationships and. Nah this is straight up drama”

Going through old journals isn’t for the weak. As I’ve said many times over, I am transporting my digital DTS journal into a physical copy. That obviously requires me to read it. Recently, I’ve been stuck on February 19th and 20th. The first day was a stupid fight between Trevor and I, that was overContinue reading “Old Journals and Home Alone”

Cody keeps reaching out. Not keeps like crazy repeatedly, but enough. I do too, with my every few week check ins. It means nothing, only explaining the title. Because he sent me a picture of a lighthouse a few minutes ago.  *** Thinking about my DTS a lot again today, but there is a reasonContinue reading “Stuffed Dinosaurs and Unexpected Texts”

Late Nights and White Noise I’m listening to my YWAM playlist right now. It was very much a “missing them” sort of day. I dreamed of a reunion, in which only JT, Charlie, and Naomi were unable to make it. I got my drivers license, six months after promising Maddie and Ashlin that I wouldContinue reading “Late Nights and White Noise”